Today Marked The End…

… of our family’s “sacred week”… or sacred nine days as it was… it varies a little bit from year to year… 

I’m not exactly sure how this got started, but basically we come home (or send people home) from whatever our last parsonage family type responsibility is before Christmas, and we close the door, take a deep breath, and sort of disappear until January 2^nd.

This year I was not ready for it to end.  This is sort of ridiculous, because I had not spoken to another human being outside of my home or immediate family in 10 days… well, except for a brief trip to Wal-Mart on the 26^th in which I felt completely claustrophobic… and the quick phone call to Dominos on New Year’s Eve when I couldn’t quite wrap my mind around the concept that they were closed… and, oh yeah, the few sentences exchanged with Keegan (age 6), who called my cell to find out if Ian could come to his “party” on New Year’s Eve…

I told Keegan we could set up a play date for later in the week.  He left me a voice message early the next morning.  I sent his mom a text message and asked them to come over today… January 2^nd…

And I’m really glad I did, because I probably needed a play date as much as Keegan did… (Keegan… who woke up his whole family at 5:00 today, because he was so excited that he would get to play with Ian…)

There’s just something about “lifelong” friends.  The truth is, I don’t really have any, but I do have a few who go back as early as 2^nd grade.  I also have some who date back to the youth group years, and I was blessed to connect with quite a few of them, via Facebook, this New Year’s Eve, as some old pictures were uncovered, dusted off, scanned, and shared.  Old friendships are really good.  And perhaps that’s one of the reasons I dug my feet in 20 months ago when life circumstances threatened to rock our world… and stability… again. 

More than a handful of people have asked me why I wanted to stay in this town.  Let’s be clear.  It’s not the town.  I haven’t completely lost all of my senses!  But we do have something here… or perhaps, better (but less grammatically) put, we have “some-ones” here…

And even though I emerged somewhat reluctantly from sacred week…  It’s good that I was met by friends when I did. 

I want my kids to have lifelong friends.  Ian and Keegan are a good example of that today, because even when you’re only six years old, anybody who was around for your first birthday party definitely counts!

 Ian and Keegan

Then: 2007

And Now 2013:

 

 L.

Just What If...

It’s a new year.  With the turn of a calendar page, we often imagine that we have a fresh start… a new beginning.  When you stop to think about it, well… it’s actually kind of arbitrary.  But just for the sake of argument, I’m going with it…

So what if I did something every single day, this year, that was worthy of a photograph?  I’ve started projects like this before, and the truth is they usually fall flat around day 12.  But maybe this time will be different… just maybe…

And so, with a renewed sense of hope that I must have dredged up from the deeply hidden inner optimist, I started planning to get the kids in their snow gear and to go build a snowman around 11:00, this morning.  Shortly after 2:00, we all finally made it out the door only to realize that the snow wouldn’t “pack” worth anything and that Seth apparently has no gloves.  I gave him mine.  Who needs gloves if you can’t build a snowman?

We had fun.

And so I give you January 1^st, 2013…  That day when Caleb managed to come in with mild looking frostbite on his stomach, because it is so fun to roll around in the powdery snow you don’t always notice that your pants are falling down…  That day when Miah kept exclaiming things like, “Hey look what I found!  A tree!”… 

It Doesn't Really Get Any Better Than This:

"This snowball is so 'coldy'"
Yep, that's what she said:

 

She thought everything was so funny:

 Ian (AKA Sharkboy):

 Snow Diva:

A couple of good looking kids

with a couple of good looking snowballs:

Hot chocolate is yummy.

Everyone is warmed up.

There is more snow in the kitchen than the backyard.

It’s been a good day.   

L.

Maybe the Mayans Were Right...

Let me get straight to the point (then I'll ramble on for awhile...)

2012 was rough enough that I found myself actually hoping that December 21st would mark the end of the world.  It's not the kind of thing you announce the day before, but after the planet survives... well... that's a different story.

For many years, I have sat down to write a Christmas letter to friends and family.  The mailing list numbers over 100.  Some years are better than others, but this year I just couldn't do it.  I did manage to come up with a quick, sort of generic, blurb for the back of our 4 x 8 Christmas card photos that we sent out to 29 addresses (mostly great aunts who don't have Facebook accounts).  The truth is, I didn't really want to share much of this year.  I just wanted it to be over.

I blogged much of the personal devastation, often in code, through the summer months.  By Fall my writing turned to an attempt to convince myself, as well as anyone else who was reading, that I was OK.  By the end of October, I all but dropped off the blogging radar, except for a few notes regarding the kids' quiz season, the election, and that aforementioned Christmas card.  Since I began blogging in 2003, I have not missed entries for the kids' birthdays, our anniversary, or holidays (at least not for the most part).  I'm going to be really frustrated someday when I look back through the 2012 posts, because they're just not there.

I'm absolutely going to hate that I have six days worth of entries for Phil's graduation from N.N.U. in 2011, but I worked for 15 years to achieve my bachelor's degree and then didn't enjoy the graduation ceremony, pasted a smile on for a couple of quick shots, neglected to order the professional photos, and wrote a few lines...

I cannot believe that I have not shared anything about Ian's first day of Kindergarten or how amazingly good he is at school.  I never would have dreamed that he would be the kid who is irritated that we still have another week of Christmas break... but he is...

Phil and I celebrated 15 years of marriage this August.  That's kind of a milestone.  I can't even remember what we did... 

I published a book!  I have always wanted to publish a book, and 2012 was the year I did it... for the first time...

I took a few minutes, this morning, to go back through my pictures of this year.  I smiled more than I cried, which was a pleasant surprise.  Since launching elemenoh-cheese, it's not all that often that I post snapshots anymore, but I found a few that really should have landed in the public realm this year, particularly because they are a reminder to me.  They represent all the really good stuff that went on in our lives, despite the stress, frustration, and depression.  Somehow, even in the midst of these things, we found some moments in which to be blessed... and in which to be thankful... 

Like this moment in which Miah is so happy at music class she looks like she could explode:

Or that time I did Seth's science project:

Or our trip to the Co-pa, by ourselves, 

in which I actually got to watch an entire game:

Or that day I was so proud of Grace that I almost embarrassed her to death:

Or Caleb's basketball adventure, 

which actually did get blogged and made the book, 

because... well... you know how it is with Caleb:

 

Or that time we decided to go to a Pacer's game?  Huh?  What were we thinking?

 

Or the day we learned we could get into the Children's Museum for $6.00 

and then proceeded to spend more money on the carousel than the tickets:

Or the sight that greeted me when I came home from my "Mommy Retreat":

Or one of the best birthdays ever, 

when I got to watch Seth and Grace quiz for the first time:

I really don't have a clue what's she's doing here, 

but it's one of those things you just have to post:

And that picture that didn't make the Christmas card:

 

And that trip to St. Louis, a rare couple of days with just "sethandgrace":

And here they are, after all... 

A couple of shots of Ian's first day of Kindergarten:

At this point you may be asking, "Lisa... what the heck does this have to do with the Mayans?"  It's simple.  Maybe my world just ended.  I have spent so much time feeling hurt and desperate this year over things that I can't change.  I have lost focus regarding what really matters.  And unlike the posts in which I tried to convince myself that everything might still turn out just the way I wanted it to; I'm legitimately ready to let go of that now.  The truth is, I already have everything I have ever wanted.

I'm not exactly living in a dream world.  2013 is going to bring with it some challenges, I'm sure.  In fact, I could probably list a few already if I really wanted to do so, and no doubt there are many others I have not even imagined to this point.  But isn't that always the way it is?  If you'd asked me, last year at this time, where I would be today; this probably wouldn't have been my answer.  But here I am...  (dare I finish the sentence)...  send me...

L.    

Christmas 2012

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