It's been an emotional roller coaster. I feel sort of silly about that, but it's the truth.
What started out as a nursery project became so much more...
First of all, let me say that as badly as I have wanted to create this room for Miah, I had no idea how hard it was going to be for me to paint over the "perfect" little girl room I created for Grace 4 years ago. To be completely honest, Grace couldn't have cared less if she'd tried. She is perfectly happy in her new room and even went as far as to tell me how much she doesn't like purple anymore (which is the color her old room was). I think this made it harder. In the end, I actually left a small area of purple (which will eventually be themed as a flower box), because I couldn't quite bring myself to paint over every last little bit. Neurotic? Yeah... probably.
Then there was the actual process of re-decorating. I have a love/hate relationship with house renovations. Painting can be stressful, and I stink at getting nails in the right places in the walls... and usually when I find the perfect place there is something that prevents the nail from actually sticking there in this old house... I couldn't even remember where I put Miah's name letters, which I made almost two years ago. I did, however, find them, just as I was about to give up and purchase new ones. The mural was actually quite fun. I like stickers.
As I was getting all of the furniture moved in and arranged, a thought hit me. The crib wasn't going to fit right, and the truth is... Miah doesn't need to sleep in a crib anymore. Choked up again, I determined to tell Phil we could just take the crib down when the room was done. I proceeded to take another week to get the room done.
And let me pause to say this about the crib. This is the first time since 2000 that our crib has not either had a baby in it our been waiting for a little person to arrive to fill it. I looked at Phil as he was taking it apart, and there were tears in his eyes, and of course he said, "don't blink," and I said, "don't get me started," and then of course I cried... again... And of course I'm tearing up even yet again as I type this... You'd almost think I was pregnant, as emotional as I've been... but really... I'm not.
I finally managed to get everything just the way I wanted it today, and with cameras... and video cameras... Miah crossed the threshold into her new room. She mercifully made some sweet little excited sounds, but the whole thing was actually fairly calm. Miah is most excited that all of her baby dolls are accessible at the same time and that there are abundant play food choices for their nutritional well being.
I almost forgot to leave space for the rocking chair... almost, but that was a non-negotiable. As I rocked her to sleep tonight, I thought about how big my baby has gotten. But when I put her in the toddler bed, covered her up, and stepped back to look at her; it hit my how very teeny tiny she really is.
And I thanked God for my precious little one... whom I cannot imagine my life without...
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